So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Randomize
