also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Randomize
