weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize