Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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