sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
