HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
You're like the curious george of whores
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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