Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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