Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Randomize
