they need to just BURY HIM!
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Randomize
