Having a random hookup so left but love u
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I just found a bag of teeth...
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Randomize
