If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Randomize
