btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize
