**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
