I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
