Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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