To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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