Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize
