so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
