She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
