Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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