She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Randomize
