I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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