I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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