just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
