Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize