PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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