ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
