it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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