What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
