I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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