I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
