This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
