I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Randomize
