just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
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