dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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