he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize