I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Randomize
