my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
