i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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