the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Randomize