I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
