Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
