Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize