Tell her she can't have a vagina
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
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