im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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