I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
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