I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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