yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
