But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Randomize
