i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
They are going to name an STD after you.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize